The Slow Edit

Alzheimer’s and Dementia creep into so many families. Having helped families move their loved ones with memory loss, I know it takes a certain level of care. Navigating this with my own mother is even more challenging.

I have had to pretend I am working as a project manager for a client I know very well to disconnect myself from the emotions.

Hoarding things or gathering things together in a bag is often a sign of memory decline. An attempt to keep treasures safe as the mind unravels. You will find notes tucked in books and lying around to remind them of what they have already forgotten.

Protecting other members of the household while things are being piled on the floor and around the walls is essential and tricky. I have come up with a method called the Slow Edit. Removing a few things from the trouble areas each time I visit seems to go unnoticed.

I plan overnight visits and sort and disperse after my mom goes to bed. This is the time I am grateful for mom having some hearing loss.

Of course, working in areas of the house that are not used as much is easy. Getting to the areas where your loved ones spend most of their time may require a mad dash during their bathroom break or when a family member takes them for a ride.

There are so many factors and circumstances intertwined in decisions. There is not always the option of moving into care center. Not everyone can manage caring for loved ones at home, either.

It is important to not disrespect your loved one. Knowing what they love is important. Taking time to find the family photos hidden in with the junk mail means it is a very slow edit!

Throughout this difficult process, remember that the goal is not perfection but preserving connection and respect.

Success is not measured by how much is discarded or how fast you sort, but by maintaining dignity and comfort throughout the process. Take your time, be patient, vent to others as needed, leave, and come back if you need to. Focus on creating a safe, familiar environment in either the new home or the refreshed room at home.